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Parent With Heart

June 10, 2008

Building Your Parenting Tool Box

dad and sonBeing a great parent isn’t something that you usually get much appreciation for! As a parent of a teen and a 21 year old, I can say that having a great tool box has made parenting more rewarding. I know I have done my best and can continue to be encouraging as my kids move into adulthood.

Would you like to improve your performance as a parent? Here are a few tips from my article:
20 TOOLS FOR BUILDING EFFECTIVE RELATIONSHIPS

  • Instead of saying what you don’t want, politely request the behavior you DO desire.
  • Take time for training! Teach the skills needed to get the behavior you desire–remember to do this one step at a time.
  • Try an “I statement” to express your feelings in a positive way.
  • Use your sense of humor–maybe a laugh would break the tension!
  • Utilize What, Why and How questions that avoid blame and shame.
  • Redirect the child’s NEED to a different, more acceptable activity.
  • Structure reasonable, respectful, and related logical consequences with the child BEFORE the misbehavior occurs, if possible.
  • Plan ahead. Hold a family meeting.

For a complete list of tips, read my special report:
20 Tips For Building Effective Relationships with Kids

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May 19, 2008

School Is Not One Size Fits All

Filed under: Teenagers — Tags: , , — admin @ 3:59 pm

In my community, we recently lost another teen to suicide. He was a successful, well liked kid from a great family. We can only conjecture about what happens when a teen feels so overwhelmed that they take such drastic measures. We do the best we can as parents, friends and counselors to help kids through times that seem beyond what they can bear.

Do you know any teens who are less than thrilled about school? Sometimes, we are lucky and kids do tell us when they are unhappy. They may say it clearly or we may see it in the way they drag themselves through their week. Their eating habits or hygiene may change. They may have “health problems”, anxiety or lethargy. I became an expert on this topic when I was in high school myself. For me, school was a miserable five days between the weekends, when I got to see my friends in a neighboring town. Back when I went to school my family had a “tough it out” attitude. If there were options, we didn’t know about them.

Well, being a parent who believes in mutual respect and honest communication, this sort of bravery didn’t work well for me. Thus began my role as a parent who suggested my son drop out of high school!

Yes, you heard me right. Don’t dismiss this article yet, though.

I am a reputable therapist with Masters Degrees in Education and Counseling. I just knew and continue to trust that if a kid is miserable in school, there must be a way to help make things better for them.

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May 2, 2008

Make Sure the Message of Love Gets Through To Your Teen!

Filed under: Teenagers — Tags: , , , — admin @ 4:09 pm

Mother and Son
Do you remember being a teenager? What things were
most important to you? Did you care about the things
your parents valued?

Parenting teens can be a fun and memorable part of
raising kids. So many parents and teens that I meet
are just not having a good time with each other.

(more…)

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